Dishing Junk – The act of dispensing ideas of little value in a casual or silly manner.

The Dumbest Reasons People Have Told Me “They Don’t Read”

“I don’t have enough time to read.”
Bullshit. Most of the people that say this to me will also want to discuss their favorite television show. I understand some people are just freakishly busy, like my neighbor, who trains for the MS run and bikes literally three hours a day to train. I got it — but I also got something for her — AUDIOBOOKS… nice right? Might not be as stimulating as  I Got The Power, but I try.

I don't have enough time to read

“I can’t read fast enough.”
So? This is because you don’t read! I guess we should all give up so easily, right? If you can’t just speed through the gate, why even try? Quitter.

“Nothing is that interesting to waste that much time.”
Yeah, but f***ing Candy Crush Saga is so very stimulating.

I read. I just read your status report and your last tweet.”

I’m just not a book kind of person.”
I can understand this, I’m just not a stupid person, kind of person.

I can’t sit still for that long.”
Did you just call me fat?

Reading is boring.”
I’m sorry, why don’t you go back to watching REAL HOUSEWIVES OF ILLITERACY COUNTY, that might stimulate you a bit more.

Reading is a nerdy hobby.”
So is thinking.

The big words stump me.”
Maybe start back at the beginning. Can I recommend ONE FISH, TWO FISH by Dr. Suess, a classic.

Stop looking at me funny, I just like to read.

I am so sick of people looking at me like I’m a freak because I like to read and read about 100 books a year. I’m not looking at everyone else because they watch 4+ hours of television a night, or they spend a few hours playing video games on their iPhone or gaming system a day.

“That’s not normal.” A relative told me at a party this past weekend. Judge much? I guess it isn’t normal, considering what is it? 25% of the US population does not read a single book a year… not even one. Another 29% did read a book this year, it was FIFTY SHADES OF GRAY. Don’t ask me for my statistics I read them somewhere. About 17% of the population actually read more then 20 books a year. Probably putting my statistic of 100+ books a year at a >1% standing. Hmm…I guess it isn’t normal. FML.

Yet, I would never think to blatantly look at someone and say their hobby  “Is not normal.” BUT IT HAPPENS TO ME ALL THE TIME!!!! And not just by my ridiculously forthright relatives. This happens with parents of children at my kids school all the time. The ones that complain about how much their kids have to read for the lessons. “How could they possibly read this much?” One parent complained to me at a birthday party. I don’t know, mine does it just fine, she loves to read, but then she sees me with a book in my hand constantly. Is that it? But, when I explain this, they look at me and the words come out, “Well, that’s not normal.”

I would never think to tell that to a parent of a child that likes to play Minecraft for hours on end. Parents bragging that it’s “creative” and how they are using it to teach certain subjects in high school. What? Never mind. Ooh yeah, go Minecraft. It’s creative! (That was sarcasm) I see nothing wrong with Minecraft, but don’t look at me like my reading habits are just “odd.” Go back to your Candy Crush Saga while your kid plays that other time-suck game. I often wonder why I have a low opinion of my fellow human beings, I shouldn’t wonder. Our book nerd posse isn’t in the “fellow human being” category IMHO.

Love you guys, keep reading, fight ignorance.