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Fifty Shades Read AlongPlease be warned, this is a post about a very sexual book. Posts will contain bad language, graphic images and adult content. If you are under 18 please move along…

Fifty Shades of Grey Chapter Seven

We now stand with Ana as she is rendered speechless by the Red Room of Pain.  We’ve got … well first we have ambient glow ?? and a womb-like effect ??? and then a big wooden cross on the wall ?? Not impressed yet, I’m thinking Church?

Ok, no sorry, there seems to be restraining cuffs on the cross, iron grid system suspended from the ceiling, ropes, chains, even some glinting shackles. Poles, spindles, paddles, whips, riding crops and feathery implements.

“It’s called a flogger.”

I’m in shock. What is the appropriate response to finding out a potential lover is a complete freaky sadist or masochist?

So, what should she do, run, walk, or jump into those shackles? You would think at this point he would give her a good excuse that she should slip into some leather and bind her hands behind her back…maybe a little sweet talk? But, no, not Christian…

    “It means I want you to willingly surrender yourself to me, in all things.”
I frown at him as I try to assimilate this idea.
“Why would I do that?”
“To please me,” he whispers as he cocks his head to one side and I see a ghost of a smile.

And that seems to be what she wants. She wants to please Christian Grey. I would have told him where he could stick his flogger…

    “In very simple terms, I want you to want to please me,” he says softly. His voice is hypnotic.
“How do I do that?” My mouth is dry, and I wish I had more wine. Okay, I understand the pleasing bit, but I am puzzled by the soft-boudoir Elizabethan-torture setup.


And then the scene is set and Christian shows her exactly what he expects of her. He brings her around and points out fun things like where her room will be (Friday through Sunday), where his room will be and the fact that the won’t have any sort of relationship out of the whole dominant submissive routine. It really is such a bummer, but through the whole thing, he gives her little tidbits…makes her think that he might want more even though he’s saying that he only wants a certain thing.

Typical male…so while he is mentioning contracts, separate sleeping arrangements, fucking only, he also says other things to confuse Ana and make her HOPE:

“Anastasia, I’ve told you. There’s something about you. I can’t leave you alone.” He smiles ironically. “I’m like a moth to a flame.”

But, of course, before they can go any further…they have to go over the Rules. I’m not going to go into them in detail. But it’s a lot of Dominant does this, Submissive does that…Dominant says this, submissive, wears this, eats this, exercises this way…we are introduced to Hard Limits and Soft Limits.

It’s quite an eye opener, especially for a girl of Ana’s experience and then Christian is so clinical about it. That is until the revelation comes out, when he asks her details about what she likes and doesn’t like:

“You’re a virgin?” he breathes. I nod, flushing again. He closes his eyes and looks to be counting to ten. When he opens them again, he’s angry, glaring at me.

Ready to move on to Chapter 8 of Fifty Shades of Grey?

Right off the bat it is obvious he’s going to drag her away and boink her…but of course we have to find out why she’s a virgin…and get another S.A.T. word!

My subconscious has reared her somnambulant head.

And that subconscious of hers has decided to come up for air just in time for Christian to so romantically sweep Ana off her feet:

“Come,” he murmurs.


“We’re going to rectify the situation right now.”

“What do you mean? What situation?”

“Your situation. Ana, I’m going to make love to you, now.”

Now isn’t that romantic?

Well, there goes the fact that he doesn’t make love. Christian, you sure know how to give a girl mixed signals! But, of course Ana is ready and willing and full of her usual:

I flush…oh my…wishes do come true.

And what follows is a sexy, but rather tame love scene that you can read in most romance novels. With a startling revelation for Ana at the end of it that, well, more of her usual absurdity…

Oh my. That was extraordinary. Now I know what all the fuss is about.

Light Bulb! <– sound effects

And more sex…and some more. It’s like quick bursts of multiple orgasms….

Ana wakes to find him playing the piano, another ‘Twilight’ companion scene and there is a very warm exchange between the two of them. Christian has just given Ana the biggest lead on that she could ever hope for. Even after that he joins her in bed…something that he also said he never does. It gives Ana the impression that he cares more for her than the other women he’s had as his subs. She’s also glimpsed a part of him that he keeps hidden and bottled up, its one of the first clues that Christian Grey is not a happy person, no matter how much wealth or toys he has. Granted from his lifestyle, most could probably guess that happiness was few and far between in his life, but Ana and her inexperience will take awhile to figure it out.

I still haven’t figured out why I like these books. Especially as I do these recaps. Even the parts that I’ve marked as my own little “oh mys” on reread, I’m all like “huh?” It is crack. You know it’s bad for you…but you keep sucking on that glass pipe. *Sigh*

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